TwoWay Street
by tiff098765
Summary: He is her equal. By now, he expects true partnership. No games, no condescention. She intends to show him that she wants the same. Some fluff, angst, romance, & fun; all Caskett.
1. Chapter 1

_I've decided to start a new story with a chapter from an old one._

_Chapter one was written for the "Shotgun!" series, though I made some changes to stay close to canon, and I'll keep the story going with new material after this. It goes along with Rick's claim that his partner owes him about a hundred coffees._

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><p>1<p>

Castle and Beckett sat in the dark car, watching the door of the empty building. Waiting. Ryan and Esposito were staking out the other location.

Kate couldn't help but be amused by how excited Castle was to go on the stakeout - more excited than usual. He'd been melancholy all day and didn't want to talk about why. She had wanted to press him, but things hadn't been the same as they used to be since she came back to work. There was a distance between them. She hated it.

So when Gates approved the two stake-outs, he'd jumped up- thrilled- and said he'd be back soon. He came back a little over an hour later with night-vision goggles, a sack of candy, a smaller bag of other snacks, and a small cooler with frozen espresso shots.

Kate had scoffed. Coffee wasn't meant to be eaten like a popsicle. But he insisted it was better than lukewarm stale coffee that had been sitting for hours in a stakeout. Plus, they were made with dulce du leche, so she would love them. She was still doubtful. But she decided to try one anyway, just because of the gleam in his eye.

He wiggled in the passenger seat, playing with the night-vision goggles, pretending they had other powers and describing the things he could see with them that were invisible to the naked eye. She smiled. She had missed this.

Ryan's voice came over the radio. "Suspect in sight." A few minutes later, "That was easy. We got him. Taking him in."

Castle's face fell. He looked like someone took his ice cream cone away. And it was still pretty early.

"What's wrong, Castle? We're supposed to get the guy. And it's a good thing for it to be easy."

His shoulders sagged. He shook his head. "It's not that. It's just…" He sighed. "I just… don't really want to go home."

Kate got worried. "Why not? What's going on?"

He sighed. "I took Alexis to the airport a few days ago. She went with friends to 'check out the campus.' She's picking out an apartment while she's there. She'll be moving in a month. And… she didn't need me to go with her this time."

"Oh." Kate placed her hand on top of his.

"And Mother's school has finished construction. She built a studio apartment in the back. She moved out last weekend. So the loft is… it's too empty. I don't want to be there."

_I'd rather be anywhere but there. Especially with you. But you'd rather be alone than be with me._

She could tell he was thinking more than he said. He looked broken. "Rick, why didn't you tell me?"

"It's not like we've been talking all that much lately. Can we just go somewhere for a while?" They had been talking more, but still not about anything important.

"Sure. Where?" She was worried about him.

"I don't care." He gazed out the window, but didn't seem to actually be looking at anything.

She cranked the car and started driving. She didn't have a destination in mind, but thought that somewhere quiet and secluded would be good. She pulled into a park that had closed at sunset, taking the maintenance road to a spot that had a nice view. She rolled down the windows to let the cool breeze blow through and killed the engine.

She again placed her hand on top of his. He closed his thumb around her fingertips.

They sat in silence for a while.

"Tell me something. Something that'll make me feel better. Please." He tried his best to not sound so pathetic and stared through the windshield at the rising moon.

All he expected from her was a joke or funny story, something to distract him. She thought he was fishing for compliments.

"It's sweet how much you love your family. They're lucky to have you."

_Distractions, Kate. That'll make me feel worse. _He rolled up his window and leaned his head against it.

"It was really shocking, and cute, when I arrested you and they came to bail you out. I never expected you to be such a family guy. It's… endearing."

She sounded like she was just trying to stroke his ego.

"And how quick you are with a joke that lifts my spirits or takes me down a notch. You always seem to know just what I need to hear."

_Still not really helping._

Her voice got softer. "And I know I can always count on you to have my back. Even if I tell you not to. And I trust you, with everything."

She sounded different. Honest. He turned to look at her as she spoke. "You're so kind. And that brain of yours… you truly amaze me sometimes. There have been so many times that you've been my rock. And I don't think you ever even realized it."

She was relaxed, one shoulder against her backrest, facing him. Leaning towards him like she was sharing a secret. She lifted her hand like she was going to touch his cheek, but lowered it to lightly rest on his chest.

"You're not alone, Rick. You're not."

She leaned in and kissed him, lightly. He gently palmed the back of her head, returning the kiss. Then he pulled away. "Don't." His voice was forced.

She expected the kiss to make him smile; instead she saw frustration and hurt.

"Just don't. You don't mean it. And I don't need your pity." He turned and rested his forehead back against his window.

Lanie was right. She had pushed him away too many times.

"Just take me home, Kate. I'd rather be there."

It suddenly felt very cold in her car. She rolled up her window and turned the ignition. _Dammit._

After a minute, he realized the car hadn't moved. He turned just enough to be able to see her in his peripheral vision. She was squeezing the steering wheel tightly. Her head was hanging, shaking no. She was silently berating herself.

His sigh brought her attention back to him. She cut the engine again and laid her hand on his arm.

"It wasn't pity." It came as almost a whisper.

He turned only enough that she could tell he was listening. "I meant it. All of it."

She tugged his arm to get him to face her. "I haven't been trying to hurt you. I just needed time. Everything's so… broken. But I can't lose you, Rick. I need you too much."

He looked like he wasn't sure if he believed her.

He studied her. He knew her tells. Maybe she was being honest.

She reached again, and the feel of her touch on the back of his neck made his chest tighten. She ran her fingers in the edge of his hair.

"I meant it, Rick. I mean it." She kissed him again.

He let her. He let himself just be kissed by her. Soulfully, longingly. Until he believed her.

His returned kiss was full of yearning and hunger.

He knew he wasn't alone anymore.

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><p><em>Please review. Getting reviews is addictive. Addictive like sipping hot coffee in my jammies on 'black Friday', knowing that my Christmas shopping was finished weeks ago so I can enjoy a stress-free Christmas season. Shopping is <em>not_ the reason for the season! Man oh man, as I look at news feeds about the insane shoppers, I'm _so_ glad to be at home!_


	2. Chapter 2

2

The windows began to fog, so Kate pulled away just enough to whisper, "Can we take this somewhere else?" But she kissed him again, followed by, "It would be incredibly embarrassing for a uniform patrolling the park to catch us." Then she kissed him again before he could answer.

She was finally starting to let go and was afraid of stopping. She didn't want to go back to how she was. How could she have been so closed off that he couldn't see just how much he meant to her? How could he have thought she would kiss him out of pity?

She tried to formulate a plan of how to prove that she was ready to move forward, to be better, but it was just so difficult to think while kissing him so thoroughly.

He chuckled into the kiss, and she could feel him smiling.

"What?" She barely moved away; her lips still touched his.

He tilted so that their foreheads touched.

"We're not exactly going to this 'somewhere else' you mentioned. And… I might have to take a picture if a uniform taps on your window."

She laughed without making a sound, "You wouldn't."

"We'll just have to wait and see." And he kissed her back, like he'd wanted to do for as long as he could remember.

But no uniforms tapped on her window. Her plates showed that her car was an unmarked police car, so the one patrol that passed left them alone. They saw movement inside, and, despite the fog, could tell that there was no struggle occurring. Check that – the officer smiled to himself – no non-consensual struggle occurring. The officers moved along when they were satisfied that there were just a couple of cops getting a little action in the work car. It happens more often than anyone admits. As they moved on, one cop said they should have taken down the tag number just in case they ever need a "favor" from a detective.

Castle was trying so hard to not get too handsy. He knew (or at least thought) he wasn't supposed to push, but there was no rule against letting her pull. And pull she did. She pulled herself right up to him so that he thought she was about to pull herself into his lap. He gasped, desperately wanting to be somewhere else. With her.

"Kate," he gasped, "can we find somewhere more comfortable?"

She smiled. She knew just the place.

Smoothing down his collar that she'd pulled, she let her hands linger on his chest, reveling in his erratic heartbeat. She loved that she did that to him.

"Sure, Castle." She smiled sweetly and finally forced her hands back to the steering wheel.

She knew just how close she'd come to letting go completely, climbing on top of him, and doing things she was sure he'd already fantasized about doing. But she'd never tell him how hard it was to _not _ give in to that desire.

The engine purred to life, slowly warming the steamed but cool interior. The defroster cleared stripes across the back window. Rick just watched her quietly. He wondered where she would take them. His place, since she knew it was empty? Or hers, since that would be even more intimate for her to share her bed with him? Would they make it to a bed? Would they just talk and sip coffee? He was the picture of calm on the outside, but he was buzzing with nervousness and anticipation on the inside.

She knew he was staring. But if he wanted to not act like hormonal teenagers "parking" in a police car, he really needed to stop. Really, really. Because she could feel his eyes on her jaw and her ear and her neck. She could still taste him, and waiting for the windows to clear so she could back out of this spot with him _looking_ at her like that was almost more than she could bear.

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><p>She switched on her blinker to signal that she was pulling in to a coffee shop, watching his reaction from the corner of her eye. The twitch of his eyebrows showed his confusion and disappointment. And Kate, being who she is, couldn't help but tease him a little. "This place has the cushiest oversized chairs. I come here to read sometimes."<p>

"That's nice." He tried to understand what was happening. He thought they'd made a breakthrough, but instead, she was putting on the breaks again. He hoped his voice didn't betray his irritation… mostly. He did hope a little bit that she knew how her stonewalling got on his nerves.

"Don't worry, Castle. We're not going in." She pulled the car around the little building to the drive-through in the back.

He grinned. "So, what's next? After we get fully caffeinated, do you have an idea where you're taking us?" _Emotionally, physically, locationally?_ So what if 'locationally' isn't a word – it fit with the other two words he wanted answers to.

"Yep."

Annoying, sexy woman. As if "Yep" answers the whole question.

She ordered his coffee without asking him how he wanted it. He took a sip and was surprised. "It's perfect."

"What, you thought the detective hadn't noticed over four years how you take your coffee?"

He thought better of saying _But you've never made coffee for me or brought coffee to me. _But she read his mind.

"I notice a lot, Castle. Maybe I pay more attention than you thought."

He smiled. He knew that already – it was the only way he got away with pushing her buttons like he did – but he loved that she was finally admitting it out loud.

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><p><em>AN: I don't love this chapter, but I hope you liked it. Please let me know. I'm addicted to reviews... like I'm addicted to laughing at my children. They're watching "The Electric Company" and trying to learn to beatbox and rap. And they're wearing costumes, so they look like tiny, silly Village People._


	3. Chapter 3

3

She drove, but not towards either of their buildings. She finally pulled into a parking space in a seemingly random area, opened the door and nodded for him to follow. Moving into his spot by her side, he asked, "Where are we going?"

"Church."

"You're kidding."

"Don't worry. We'll get where you want to be." Well, alrighty then.

They stepped into a luxurious 1920's hotel, and she headed straight to the elevators.

"I thought you said church. This isn't a church." This didn't make sense. He loved a good mystery, but he thought with the way things were going, he might _finally_ get lucky with Kate, and he really wasn't up for figuring this mystery out. Then a lightbulb went off above his head.

"Ooh, did you get us a room here? So I can worship your body?" He tried to sound sarcastic instead of eager in case he was way off-base.

She smiled at him in that way she does when he's being cute and goofy. Huh. Didn't look like a yes-I-got-us-a-honeymoon-suite look.

The elevator dinged and opened to a rooftop garden. It was_ gorgeous_. It even had a pool with a fat frog fountain spitting into it. She took his hand and led him across until they could see the magnificent St. Patrick's Cathedral. "Do you know where we are?" she asked.

"I do. We're at the roof garden that Spider-Man dropped Mary Jane onto in the first movie after he rescued her."

Her laugh lines showed with her amusement. "Very true. But I was talking about the cathedral. Do you know it?"

"St. Patrick's. The setting of _The Godfather 3_, James Patterson's _Step On A Crack_, and Wilhelmina and Bradford's wedding."

"Wilhelmina and Bradford?"

"On _Ugly Betty._"

She laughed, so he smiled. "Only you. I point out a historic church, and you associate the mob, your poker buddy, and a screwball comedy."

"That surprises you? And you left out the superhero."

"No, it doesn't surprise me at all. And the superhero was for the garden, not the church."

"So… why are we here, Kate?"

She took a deep breath and looked at the cathedral. "The church was started as a Jesuit school, then became a Trappist monastery that took care of orphans, then the building burned and the bishop decided to build a cathedral instead of another regular church. The Civil War interrupted the construction, but-"

"Why the history lesson, Kate?" Stop evading. Just talk. It's not _that_ freaking hard.

"They still help the poor and destitute. They would send pro-bono cases to my mother. Her funeral was there, even though she wasn't all that religious. Babe Ruth, Vince Lombardi, and RFK's funerals were there, too."

"She was among the greats." Was that what the take-away was supposed to be, or was she just ruminating?

"She certainly was."

He scratched his neck nervously, because he still didn't know why they were there. Then she looked him in the eye.

"Sitting at the cemetery is too depressing, so I come here because it's more beautiful, and I'm reminded more of her life than her death."

He put his arm around her and hugged her to his side, then lead her to a bench by the water.

"So, Richard Castle, sitting here in the shadow of New York's oldest church, after everything we've been through, after me trying to give you reminders that I was working my way to you, tell me why you thought I would kiss you out of pity?"

His mouth opened and closed, at a loss for the right answer. His eyes shifted away from her. For all their dodging, for all the things they've left unsaid, now she wants a straight answer? Fine.

"Because you flirt, then you walk away. You let me touch you, just for a moment, then you tell me to stop. You say things I know you don't mean, but I can't tell _why_. You pull me closer, only to push me away the next minute. I feel like a yo-yo around you."

"A yo-yo, huh?" She didn't like what she heard, but she also knew it was true.

"Sometimes when you flirt with me, it feels like you're just being a friend joking around, and sometimes it seems like you're doing it because you think it would crush me if I lost hope in us."

So… even her flirting didn't convince him she was his. He thought it was teasing, that there was no promise in it.

She hung her head. "Rick, I flirted, even when I wasn't ready, so you'd have hope. I've been working on getting better. I want to be better."

"But you still don't let me in. You still act like things are still the same. I just-"

"I brought you here. Where I go when I miss my mom. And I bought you coffee. And I got completely consumed in kissing you. After _that_ in the car, do you still doubt my intentions?" She looked up at him through her lashes and took his hand. "I'm in this, Rick. I've been in it for a really long time."

His forehead crinkled as he absorbed what she said and tried to come up with a response. He couldn't think of anything good to say. So he kissed her.

Softly, at first. Looking for the promise and hope that she'd just spoken. She answered with sweet abandon, not caring how much of her true self she showed him. Considering how much they steamed up the car, this kiss was surprisingly unhurried. They tasted each other, felt the softness of lips, touched with gentle caresses. Her hand slipped under his shirt just to be able to touch him. God, she'd wanted to do that for so long. It was deliberate and relaxed and comfortable and_ such_ an _incredible_ turn on.

"Get a room." The voice from near the elevator made them jump, since they didn't notice anyone else arriving at the garden.

Rick backed up but didn't remove his hands from Kate's waist. He looked at her with a devilish "I dare you" look. She answered with a "Maybe I will" look.

She pressed the pad of her thumb to her lips while her naughty smile turned shy… then happy. She stood.

"Come on, Castle. You heard the man."

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><p><em>Please review! They're addictive like this picture... I could stare all day.<em>

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